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jules the crazy is poisonous! Induce vomitting if ingested.

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So watch out!

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Oh, so appropriate.

The University of Blogging Presents to julie An Honorary Bachelor of Survey Science Majoring in Cheesey Memes Signed Dr. GoQuiz.com ®

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Sweet Rest, One Day Hence

"If I had a teacher that looked like you, I would have become an astronaut."
Heh, some dude on the Onion IM'ed me with that.

Also, got to chat with cuteteacher. Mm, he's cute. Pretty sure he's taken, too, but that doesn't matter. Not because I'm a wanton hussy, but because it's not like I have any hope of attracting anyone.

Today was alright. My lessons were pretty bad, because Wednesday nights are full of classes and no time for silly lesson planning. (Though apparently at least some time for leisure blogging--good thing I have my priorities all lined up!)

Class B were angels this morning! I love them on Tuesdays and Thursdays. The other days of the week, I could toss half of them out of my third-floor window. For all of first period reading workshop, they were awesome. I put them into literature circles for the first time, and they ALL read SILENTLY, then used accountable talk when they were supposed to! It was a beautiful sight to behold.

Class A was okay today. I had to step partway out the door to talk to two students that came in late, and Little K continued fielding suggestions for action words and writing them on the board, while standing on a stool (because he really is little). It was kind of cute. I had to remind him to double his consonants for words like jogged and hopped and whatever.

I kept the five brats from yesterday for lunch detention. I told them to scrub the desks and then gave them a stern talking-to. I think they rolled their eyes and just waited it out. Which is okay, I can't expect much different. I do my teacher-lecture thing, they do their impatient-kid thing. All's right with the world. (That sounds sarcastic, but I'm totally serious.) Some of them did say sorry, though. We'll see how tomorrow goes.

Class C this afternoon was, big surprise, chatty. Such a disappointment that there was no silence during the reading period, because Class B had done so beautifully. For writing, at some point it actually got totally quiet for a minute, and I said, "Goodness me, it's quiet! Does that mean you all are working? I'm shocked!" kind of goofy...and so the room erupted in laughs. Dammit, I broke the spell. I try to be not boring in my word choices, but it backfires. I said that they should turn in perfect papers tomorrow, so I can "pop those suckers right up on the bulletin board." More laughs and giggles and comments. Argh.

Yesterday there was a funny one, though. The school pictures came back, and each kid that got individual pictures also got a copy of their class picture. I was in their class picture too, since I'm their homeroom teacher. It looks like the elementary school pictures of my youth, except mine is the ony white face. And so when I looked at it, I said out loud, "God, I look so white in this picture!" And this girl Chatty C cracked up and made sure to tell everyone else.

Tomorrow is Friday!

We have testing to do, but it's only a practice test. We will then evaluate the results for the next three weeks of 'test sophistication Fridays'. So no real lesson needed for tomorrow. Whee!

So tired. Very slightly less phlegmy today, but just as coughy and congested. Hurrah.

Fee Fie Fo Fum, I smell...Friday!

Thank god only two days left are left of the week.

Let's see. It's late. All of the classes were sort of shitty today. Not horrible or anything, but there was too much chatting and attitude from too many of them. Especially Class B. Which was such a shame because nearly half the class was desperately trying to participate. Days like this, I'm like, dang, I really do kind of suck at this. Teaching, I mean. Oh well.

Had QC class today, after two weeks of not being there. Didn't feel like I'd been gone or anything. I also was not prepared; I did not even pretend to try to do any work for either class. Right. Class=lame and boring! Ha, I'm such a hypocrite. Like I care anymore; I'm too busy for that shit, man.

Cute nice boy is killing me. He was pretty flirty tonight, but I always think boys are teasing me when they're too nice. I wasn't sure how to react, so I just played it light. During our class note-taking conversation, he called me smart, then cute, then composed lyrical odes to me. My response: Shut up! We laughed. Aw, he's cute and he's too nice. It's fun to giggle and daydream about a boy liking me...but I usually regress to my thirteen-year-old, insecure self and say, Naw, I'm weird, unattractive, too smart, too smart-alecky, and standoffish. And insecure. No one would like me. Nothing comes of this crap anyway; the daydreaming or the insecure ramblings. So shut up, me.

Goddammit.

You know how this illness is still lingering? Well, this sounds weird, but it's starting over, even as it's still there.

I've got the coughing and the hacking. But the sore throat is here again. And this very odd feeling in my neck possibly related to sinus congestion or something. Like I'm now getting another cold or whatever on top of whatever I've had for the past three or four weeks.

----

I'm watching a tape of Medium from last night, and that commercial came on. It shows a boy walking through a series of rooms, getting older in each room. Each room features people hypnotized in front of a television. The music is a creepy, accordion type that usually accompanies suspenseful action.

The first time I saw this ad, I was a bit creeped out and figured it was some kind of PSA about the evils of television. Like, 'Get outside and LIVE your life before you grow old and DIE!'

But actually, it's an ad FOR TELEVISION.

What is wrong with this country?

Help!! Can't...resist..the Memes!!

bold the states you've been to, underline the states you've lived in and italicize the state you're in now...

Alabama / Alaska / Arizona / Arkansas / California / Colorado / Connecticut / Delaware / Florida / Georgia / Hawaii / Idaho / Illinois / Indiana / Iowa / Kansas / Kentucky / Louisiana / Maine / Maryland / Massachusetts / Michigan / Minnesota / Mississippi / Missouri / Montana / Nebraska / Nevada / New Hampshire / New Jersey / New Mexico / New York / North Carolina / North Dakota / Ohio / Oklahoma / Oregon / Pennsylvania / Rhode Island / South Carolina / South Dakota / Tennessee / Texas / Utah / Vermont / Virginia / Washington / West Virginia / Wisconsin / Wyoming / Washington D.C /

Go HERE to have a form generate the HTML for you. (Thanks, Mz Smlph!)
________________________________________________________________
Very interesting! Here I thought I was all well-traveled, but this looks kind of lame. Eight of those states are from my time in AmeriCorps only (and I included Maryland as "lived in" because it was our home base for ten months, so I was there the most). I figured that I shouldn't count the four more states (Ohio, Colorado, Pennsylvania, and possibly Louisiana) where I've only been in the airport or bus depot. Also, when I got to the states that my teammates are from (notably Iowa and Nebraska), I caught myself almost putting "been there" when in fact I haven't. Weird!


you are the cute but psycho happy bunny. You
adorable, but a little out there. It's alright,
you might not have it all, but there are worse


which happy bunny are you?
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Hee hee! kinda true!

I'll take the compromise

The snowstorm had a bigger bark than bite. Or...something. It only snowed like four inches. (Wow, I can't believe I just wrote "ONLY FOUR INCHES OF SNOW." I am a bad Seattleite!) So of course the schools were all open. I made it in on time, but a lot of teachers did not. Bless them, neither did lots of students.

All the sixth-graders were cooped up in the auditorium for first, second, and third periods. This time they got to watch "You Got Served." Again with the inane dialogue. But fabulous dancing. Mm, I do love watching boys dance. Er, young men. Don't want to sound pervy.

This, combined with my fourth-period lunch, meant that I really didn't do anything all morning. Sweet!

Class B and Class C were both half-full, if you will. So they split up nearly-full Class A and sent half around with B and the other half with C. No, wait. They split up Class B and sent them around with A and C. It's hard to keep track of who's who; it's very odd to see different faces in the same room.

There was no way I was going to teach today, so Class A/B played Apples to Apples. Class B/C also got to do some MadLibs.

I did not assign new homework; I told them that since they're getting an extra night, every single one of them should have Monday's homework to turn in tomorrow. We'll see how it goes.
Plus, this means less to correct for me. Which is great, since I still have one assignment (three sets) from before break, and a shitload of stories to read from the break's homework (I got a lot of those turned it! Good for them but shitty for me). BOO!

I am tired. Congesty. Coughy. Phlegmy. Nose-blowy. Hey, that would make a fun song. My band will be called Nu Teacherz. The first album will be called "Welcome to Skool, Suckas!"

Could not have said it better myself.

http://haloscan.com/tb/posthipchick/110963424034923707

Whee!

Three Bad Things. Okay, Four.

One: My left wrist hurts like a motherfucker, and I didn't even do anything to it. Ow.

Two: Stepping between some desks and a short, crappy file cabinet, the sharp metal corner of the cabinet caught and ripped my cords, which are also my one and only pair of size-8 trousers (thus the only ones that fit--thus affirming my relative thinness!). A small enough tear that if I were so inclined, I could probably sew it back. Sadly, I am not needle-handy. I will definitely continue to wear them out and around, but probably not to school anymore. Boo.

Three: Despite the impending DOOM of this storm, the chances of school being cancelled are virtually nil. I hear that snow has to be like three feet for school to be canceled, because those great and awe-inspiring plows make the streets "clear." Dammit. [In comparison, two inches of snow in Seattle will at least postpone school for an hour or two, and if it's more, or especially cold and thus icy, we're out of there, baby.]

Four: False Alarm! Phlegm stage of Monewts still fully active and engaged!

Weird, random aside: I do some pretty good planning/thinking in the shower. And also during the walk to the train the morning. Both are totally free times, and I often will (quietly) talk myself through a lesson or the week or figure out the logic of lesson order. Am I the only one who does this?

Here We Go Again--Double Whammy

First day back at school after midwinter break. ALSO, another big ol' snowstorm! We're supposed to get between 6-12 inches between earlier this afternoon (2ish) and tomorrow at noon. Eek.

Well, let's start the day at the beginning, shall we? I went to bed at 11 and, of course, was not tired. Naturally. All night I tossed and turned, doing the "my eyes are closed! look! i'm sleeping! right? RIGHT?!" thing. Meaning, not really asleep. Weird worry-half-dreams about school and lessons and shit. After the alarm went off (which was really terrible to wake up to! I miss vacation already!), I was quite awake and alert, considering I wasn't really sleeping anyway.

Going to school felt very strange and surreal. Like I wasn'tsure I was doing what I was supposed to. And not positive it was the right day. (I'm always second-guessing myself like that.) Quite odd, altogether. Had to make a mad dash for the bus, which was idling at the curb when I emerged from the subway entrance. (Can you emerge from an entrance? Hm.) So I ran down the block, getting slowed/stopped by an old woman and then a car. I actually yelled out, "Move! Move! FUCK!", which kind of made me giggle, mid-panic. I made the bus, and I was the last one; a minute later a few more people tried to get on, pounding on the closed door, but the driver just moved on. Harsh.

Let's see. I was kind of happy to see the students. Shh, don't tell anyone. However, my head ached and felt fuzzy from lack of sleep and eat. I still coughed all day and blew my nose a bunch. Sexy!

Class A started things off...they were quite rowdy at the beginning of class. A lot, really. Once things got settled, though, they actually calmed down and were all on task. Just one little bugger was all talky and noisy. The others...were good. Holy cow.

I did decide to do the basics first, and I will do sort of a 'skill of the week.' We're starting with character development. I read them "Eleven" by Sandra Cisneros (an excellent and very short story; I highly recommend it), and they took notes on personality of the main character. Then they finally got to start reading Bridge to Terabithia, and they took notes on that main character.

For writing workshop, we made character maps. A few weeks ago we did self-character maps, but today I asked them to think about somebody they know really well, and make a character map about that person. For homework, they are to use those details to make a written description about them.

Class B was okay. Attitude A was in top form, so I sent her shrieky ass out of the room. Those two boys who don't do anything...didn't do anything except cause trouble today. But two boys who can be troublesome did pretty well staying semi-focused. That's cool.

Class C was okay too. They did pretty well with the reading stuff. Fairly chatty with the writing stuff. Same old, same old.

I stayed about an hour after school, doing paperwork type things, because they canceled the PD! Whee! See, snow is not so bad, is it?

Question: Should they still call it a "Winter Storm Warning" AFTER it's started snowing?

Hi-larious links! Or, What Do You Mean? Of Course I'm Working!

These links are some seriously funny shit:

http://www.i-am-bored.com/bored_link.cfm?link_id=8677

http://www.i-am-bored.com/bored_link.cfm?link_id=8628

http://www.i-am-bored.com/bored_link.cfm?link_id=8423

From the Funny State Mottos:
Washington: Help! We're Overrun By Nerds And Slackers!

BOO! HISS!

I don't wanna go back to school tomorrow! Waah! Boo!

Yesterday I did some vague preparation for the week, by finding some great story-writing-tip sites. Printed out a bunch of stuff to help me help the kids. I found some really good stuff. What I really would love to do is write my own short story. Then they can watch me rewrite and edit, so that they can get some ideas of how it's actually done.

Here's what I really need to focus on: taking my sweet time in the classroom. That last week, where we worked on the basics of writing dialogue the whole time, really showed me that if they get to keep practicing things, they will actually get it. So that's what I need to do. A workshop topic of the week, if you will. I think this week I will continue with what I started before break: using descriptive language, in dialogue, and also in setting, action, and plot.

Or I should start focusing on the elements of fiction. We need to do some character development practice (not like I have any clues how the fuck to do that myself, let alone teach it!), and some plot work, at the very least. I suppose that could come after the descriptive language. Hm. Or actually, it probably makes more sense to do the fundamentals first and then revise it with descriptive language. Fuck. That's more complicated and more work for me. Dammit.

I still have to form the groups for literature circles. I'm really dragging my feet with this shit. I've been anxious to get it started, but I'm not motivated to do all the necessary work for it. FUCK.

Yesterday seemed to mark the end (finally!) of the phlegm stage of this month's Monewts, but I'm still becoming more and more congested. Dammit. It was tough to sleep last night, because I couldn't breathe through my nose. Then I have to try and breathe through my mouth, which causes nasty-tasting cotton mouth...and I'm also always a tiny bit afraid of creatures that would be able to crawl in. Yeeech.

I realized that for nearly the past week, I've only slept five hours a night. No wonder I've been utterly exhausted! The jetlag and timezone adjustment, plus my natural nightowl tendencies, and social opportunities, have joined forces, not unlike Captain America, but significantly less benevolent, to create a terrible pattern of sleeplessness and malaise. Again, BOO! HISS!

Think You're Smart?

Take a gander at this here:

http://www.oldwestlibrary.com/OWL/kansas1895.htm

I've never even heard of a few of these things, and much of the rest I never learned. I wish we could still learn and teach this kind of thing; it's hard core, but I bet it's effective for producing intelligent and productive citizens for the future.

From the car: the Space Needle and Experience Music Project (the shiny, weird-shaped building behind the light pole).  

The requisite Seattle skyline shot.  

The Boy Scouts donated this very small replica of the Statue of Liberty on Alki Beach. Let there be light! 

My little sister and me at Snoqualmie Falls, in that golden, late-afternoon light. 

I'd never seen this view before: the Olympic mountain range from Alki Beach in West Seattle, Puget Sound, and a ferry, all behind a tiny Statue of Liberty replica. Gorgeous, no? I'm telling you, you East Coasters are missing out, big time. 

A bit of melancholy

This has been a very odd week. A weekend at home, ignoring work. Then most of a workweek spent not working, but on 'vacation' back on the West Coast. Now back for a frenzied weekend of work to prepare for school.

I'm not sure how I feel about being back in New York right now. I certainly wanted to avoid coming back to all the work. But I don't feel different or wistful about the home I just visited, either. It's strange. I do miss my people out there, don't get me wrong. It was nice to visit with all of them. But this new, insane life out here takes up so much time and effort that the year is speeding by and I don't really have time to think about what I'm 'missing' at 'home.'

The strange thing is that I actually have a life out here. It's meaningful and it's understandable to all people (unlike AmeriCorps). It was kind of gratifying to go back and talk about what it is that I do. I felt like a responsible person, a grown-up person doing her own thing.

For I really am that pioneering, crazy girl who struck out on her own, doing this insane thing that many people would not. It's beyond difficult, and it's proving to be the ultimate adventure, as well as the penultimate personality test.

I'm feeling proud of this new, true independence.

How will I fare by the end of this idealistic sojourn? It's most likely that I will only stay in New York for another year, maybe two, and then return to the Northwest. Will I be ready for the 'letdown' of returning to my comfort zone after years in a veritable battle area? Will I want to continue my quest to help better the education of American children? Will I flounder again in career fatigue and indecision? Stick myself with a deadend temp job while I desperately try to find my real identity and ideal career path?

Family and friend issues have a singularly depressing effect on me. When I think about that stuff, I get all melancholy, feeling unworthy and lonely. I question my identity and whether I have any valuable skills or attributes. I question whether anyone really would want to be my friend. If I even have any true friends. I roll my eyes and say to myself, god, no one wants to put up with this self-indulgent drama bullshit; of course there are no friends out there. I feel undesirable. I'm shy and awkward, like my inner self is still fifteen.

I've been utterly exhausted for days on end. I can't shake this fatigue. It could be this stupid illness, it could be jetlag--hell, it could be mono. I took a nap for nearly five hours this afternoon, and still could have/should have gone to bed no later than eleven tonight. But I stayed up and then when it was already far too late, too much stuff was rolling around in my head. Also, I couldn't breathe properly. So, in an effort to put off thinking about work and how far behind I am, I got back up. When it's the middle of the night, I always revert to that negative, introspective, poor-self-esteem state of mind that I really should have grown out of after freshman year of college. So here you have this entry: a peek into my head, full of loneliness and self-doubts even though I can identify parts of my life that I should be excited about. I deliberately turn my back on that happy shit and focus on the sad.

Inside Out and Otherwise All Mixed Up

I have decided that I need to name this illness: Monthly New Teacher Syndrome (MoNewTS for short). MoNewTS is a serious, though unheard-of, sickness involving the immune system, various muscles, and mental health. It's kind of like herpes; you only get occasional breakouts. Sometimes it goes into 'remission' and you think you're completely cured. But oh ho, you are not.

You'll know if you have MoNewTs if you consistently get a little bit sick each month. It usually takes the form of a nasty cold involving excess body fluids, sneezing, and sore throat: all things that a teacher needs the least. You will be excessively tired all month long, but more so when MoNewTS is active. There will be much uncomfortable coughing, phlegm-hacking, nose-blowing, and decongestant-intaking. You will also be lethargic, but with an extra perk: you will not have any energy for fun things, but you will also not have any energy to get your real work done. Or in some extreme cases, you won't even be able to get it started.

Inexplicably, MoNewTS is a short-term disease, affecting people for anywhere between 8 and 10 months and then finally clearing up. It's like colic; most everyone goes through it, and some cases are worse than others.

February's MoNewTS got things a little mixed up. The sore throat started things off, like it normally does. There followed a week of apparent normalness. However, then came the coughing. Soon enough, the urge to cough included the urge to expel lovely, sticky phlegm. After nearly a week of that, the MoNewTS is moving upward, causing congestion, stuffiness, disrupted breathing, excessive sneezing, and general discomfort. Usually MoNewTS goes the other way: it all starts up top with the throat and the congestion, eventually moving down into the lungs. I'm blaming the antibiotics.

Can't wait for March's outbreak! What new, titillating surprises will it bring?

Mount Rainier, from my dad's house. This view continually takes my breath away, and I've been seeing it for fifteen years.