Thursday, August 14, 2008

Crybaby

Well, apparently things really are stressing me out--yesterday I teared up during training at the sheer overwhelmingness of it all. I think deep down I am really not sure if I can do this--or at least do this well. That I shouldn't be teaching at all. Add that to a week and a half of sitting and stewing, not knowing much for sure about exactly what the coming year will actually entail--that's a good making for some stress hormones.

Also, I am so tired. More so every day. I've been going to bed at 10.15-10.30 and it's just not enough.

And more also, my knees suck. Patellar tendonitis and bursitis on both sides. Fun times!

You really can't blame me for a few tears now, can you?

5 comments:

browneyedgirlie said...

Change is hard, and goodness knows, you're in the middle of a lot of it.

A new job, a new apartment, both within weeks of one another.

I'd be tearing my hair out, so you're already doing better than me ;)

You're going to be awesome, Jules...just take some deep breaths, have some chocolate, and indulge in a bit of men's Olympic swimming ;)

Dr. G said...

You'll be fine. You can borrow some of my confidence in you if you need to. Everytime you start something new you feel like a nincompoop! If you felt great you'd actually be a nincompoop. But hey! What's going on with the knees. Too much jumping? Naaaaah. But maybe you need better shoes. Tendonitis is no fun.

AMPlifier said...

Awww, I totally empathize. The start of a new school year is an overwhelming feeling.

It's also been my experience that when you're not "in your flow" of life, if you know what I mean, your body gives you signals.

Either one of two things will happen: this stressful time will pass and you'll settle into smoother sailing, or it will continue to get worse, fall apart, and force you to make a change in the direction of your happiness. Either way, you'll end up fine. :)

Miss G said...

I agree with amplifier! Everything is always ok in the end, and you would not have been hired if you were not super capable.
We are all overwhelmed. Some of us are just more honest about it than others.
Take time for yourself and do whatever relaxes you....and if that's drinking coffee or wine at a great little place in Brooklyn, think about including me :)

Mintyfresh said...

i'm catching up on very negligent blog reading and wanted to reach out and give you a hug! transitions and changes are HARD and they bring up emotions we can't control. I have so been there. Just be kind to yourself.

When can we get together before you're stuck in school all the time? :)