Last night I called a friend of mine, a former teammate. I asked if he wanted do something. Kind of inviting myself, and possibly a pity invite in reply. But I actually left my house and hung out with him, his friend/my subletter, and later another former AmeriCorps person. I was glad I did that, I had a really nice time. I had a few drinks and was nicely inebriated. It felt very strange to be in Manhattan, I was all disoriented. Being in a crowded bar was also very weird; I'm not used to crowds of anything but eleven-year-olds. After the bars, there was a pizza outing, which was perfect. And I crashed at someone's apartment because it was so late by then.
I need more of that. Hanging out with peers and just having a nice, easy time. No hard core clubbing, no loud bad music (there was some loudish music, but it was decent stuff at least), and good people.
It hit me early yesterday evening that my birthday had come and gone without a single celebratory event. Not a thing. That hit me really hard, really depressed me. It made me feel even more alone and lonely. So I truly needed a night out; I actually felt like a pretty normal person. Not a teacher, just a girl who needs to go out more.