I did it

I called in to say that I will be absent tomorrow. Good lord, I am actually taking a day off! This is the first of this school year, and the first one in a long time, period.

Right now I am very glad to know that I won't need to get up early, because I have that nasty, dull, long-lasting headache that comes after a good bout of crying. Also, I know I am exhausted and worn out.

Thank you so much for the encouraging comments/replies. They really helped me feel better, and feel okay about taking time for myself. Hugs to you!

I did get a tiny bit of work done. I looked at the homework (most of it are things that need to just be checked off rather than actually graded, if that makes sense) that needs to be corrected. No, that's really all I did; I took it out of my bag, put the piles on the floor, looked at them in despair, and actually said out loud, 'I can't do this right now.'

I made some phone calls to a couple parents. I wonder if any effect of that will be voided by me not showing up tomorrow. I talked to the Asshole's guardian. She was shocked and embarrassed when I told her what he said. She has been in contact with the principal about his behavior, since it clearly stems from his home/personal life. The kid is supposed to be starting counseling any time now. And I said that I totally understand that he's going through an awful time, but that this behavior, in context with the greater pattern, is unacceptable and out of line. She didn't really want to hear that. I don't know. At least now I know her side of things. I need to talk to the principal, let him know my side of things, and talk more about what the counseling stuff can help with.

I also made preparations for the bulletin board. It's totally due tomorrow, and the kids turned in their persuasive essays today. If I were a better, more-prepared teacher, I could have stayed at school and graded them and at least put those up, and then waited on the decorating part. But no. Last month, I only quickly glanced at them and then threw the good ones in a pile to go up.

As my mom told me, if I choose to take time for myself, it should be constructive. So I will finish the preparation for the bulletin board, plan for Friday's test prep (though Ms F already started helping me with some great things), and wade through at least some of the homework.